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Ask Shifra

Something Different... Answering questions and making curious observations (online) since 2005.


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Sunday, May 21, 2006

Conflict Avoidance - The Asparagus Edition

Yes, it's true - I'm a conflict avoider.
I'm a lover not a fighter. I like to help where I can, and stay far far away from where I'm not wanted. I know blogging and commenting is about expressing ideas and opinions and I love that, but I really don't like seeing people get their feelings hurt.

That last post you see below was meant as nothing more than a little joke - a throwaway ha-ha type of post. I had no idea the kind that it would generate the kind of bible quoting, rav accusing, insult hurling, mocking and mock-mocking passion it did. And so I will do what I always do in times of conflict which is to APOLOGISE all around.

Anywho - lesson learned.
Never again will I quote an offline conversation with a reader (even with his/her permission) on my blog. This is the second time I've gotten into trouble for this sort of thing and with me it's usually twice bitten the third time shy (I'm a bit slow sometimes.)

And now back to our regularly scheduled program.

Oh and I almost forgot - I've been dropped from the Treppenwitz blogroll!
Maybe it's because my blog got so depressing and I stopped writing almost entirely for weeks (and I'm sorry about that too!) but seeing my name up there on the big guy's blog when I stopped by for a good read made me very happy while it lasted.

8 Comments:

At 10:17 PM, Blogger Eliyahu said...

while it is true that sometimes you can't win, really, you must take credit for what was a very interesting exchange. the asparagus tipping point, if you will. this was worth discussing, and a good time was had by most.

 
At 11:53 PM, Anonymous MordyS said...

i too would like to apologize for my comment. it seems as the party involved was particularly offended by my unsolicited mock-mocking. i realize my sharpness may come off as a little too sharp for some and i sincerely did not, and do not, wish to cause insult by anything i write. levels of sensitivities and senses of humor don't matter when someone comes out feeling personally attacked. my only intention in all that i write is to make things become as clear to others as they seem to be to me. that is why i took the time to write a response to anon's comment and that is why i am devoting time to apologizing. i was not offended by what you assumed about my character(cuz frankly, dude, this is the internet. you don't know me and i don't you!), and i did not feel the need to defend my post. what i did feel the need to do was explain what i was trying to convey more clearly as i saw that there was a need. but i really am sorry if you were initially offended, perturbed, annoyed, or whatever by my comment, and i hope my explanation cleared everything up. now, if you wanna know why i care to even give my opinion in the first place, that's another story...

 
At 8:57 AM, Blogger Elie said...

I don't think you need apologize for a post that generated such an interesting discussion, even if it was an unintended result. Those that crossed the bounds of civil discourse owe apologies to their targets (and to you!). But please don't shy away from controvertial questions; those are the ones that likely need the advise the most!

 
At 10:49 AM, Blogger Still Wonderin' said...

Shifra -- never explain, never complain. It's fine to drop a bomb and walk away. You did nothing wrong unless it's a crime to provide a bunch of wet-blankets with no sense of humor an opportunity to engage in hours of self-righteous posturing.

 
At 3:21 PM, Blogger Elie said...

Two BTWs:

1) Great graphic!

2) Hey, Trep never listed me in the first place, and you know the old saying,"better to have been bloglisted and dropped, than never to have been bloglisted at all...."

 
At 11:56 AM, Blogger Malka Esther said...

I found the discussion fascinating and actually fun. Unfortunately on the internt tone of voice, sarcasm, joking don't come across well and that can make a discussion go from bad to worse but really I thought it was a good comment thread.

 
At 8:52 PM, Blogger PsychoToddler said...

Maybe Trep is a closet asparagus eater.

BTW both you and trep made shiva "calls" and that gives you both permanent spots on my blogroll.

 
At 9:02 PM, Blogger Shifra said...

PT - No thanks is necessary but I'd be honored to have a place on your blogroll temporary or otherwise.

 

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