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Ask Shifra

Something Different... Answering questions and making curious observations (online) since 2005.

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Wednesday, August 02, 2006

Anderson Cooper 24/7

Like many of you thoughts of the war in Lebanon/Israel have been on my mind constantly these past weeks.

Since Jameel needs to sleep at least a few hours a night I've been watching a lot of CNN in the evenings. Based on my limited viewing (I'm normally not much of a news junkie) it seems like Anderson Cooper is the only anchorman they have - excluding Larry King of course but he creeps me out - can't they give that man a gold watch and send him home already? ICK.

Anyway back to Anderson Cooper - He reminds me of a man I used to work with who was a former US Navy officer (but unlike Cooper he was called up at the start of the war in Iraq and is still deployed as far as I know.) I'm suspicious of A.C. - he's kind of handsome in a decidedly cultivated sort of way and semi-intelligent but not in a way that would make anyone else feel bad about themselves. He occasionally reminds me of a robot of some kind. If the world suddenly discovered he was an android prototype I was not be surprised.

He's been hosting his show Anderson Cooper 360 live on location from the Israeli/Lebanese border and as with all live, on-location, overly long news programs (I wanted to write programmes - does that look snooty?) he repeats himself and others A LOT.

The other day on his programme (I think it looks good, sorry) one of the other journalists he was speaking to via satellite wondered if one of the two sides might be "extending the fig leaf" any time soon.

Extending the FIG LEAF?!?!

Talk about a mixed metaphor. As I was thinking about how that modified expression sounded like the punch line to a dirty joke I heard ol' Anderson repeat the phrase back in his response (I'm paraphrasing of course) "no, it doesn't seem like anyone will be ready extend the fig leaf just yet..." Hilarious!

When I heard it the third time (repeated once again by the other off camera journalist) I was yelling at the TV like an drunk Irish soccer fan "the OLIVE branch!!! the OLIVE branch!! What's WRONG with you people!!"

At the fourth repetition I turned the TV off.

OK that was a little bit of an unstructured looney post but I hope SOMEONE out there will appreciate it. Maybe Wolf Blitzer or George Stephanopolis?

Wishing you all a meaningful fast, it is my sincere hope that we do not add even one more incident or accident to the list of Tisha B'Av tragedies this year.
Keep your helmet on Anderson Cooper - where ever you are.


At 8:09 PM, Blogger projgen said...

ROFL!!! "fig leaf"???

Well, that's the end of that expression. The whole world is going to start saying 'fig leaf' now. *sigh*

I find it mental overload that, at least where I am, AC is on at 6, 8 and 10. 8 and 10 being repeats of 6. So it's the same information over and over and over. Which makes the war seems 3 times as bad as it, which is already bad enough.

May you have a meaningful fast.

At 11:49 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Extend the fig leaf already.
It's time we gave penis a chance!!

At 4:47 PM, Blogger The back of the hill said...

Beware of Geeks bearing fig leaves.

I am cautious about taking extended fig leaves, as I do not know where they have been.

This war? It's all about clothing choices, clearly.

At 9:56 PM, Blogger Elie said...

Shifra: Was the joke the one about how you know Adam was an accountant? ;-}

At 2:02 AM, Blogger Jack Steiner said...

The last time I extended my fig leaf I...oh forget it. That is just too easy.

At 1:45 PM, Blogger DTC said...

The real question is: which side of Hizbollah's fig leaf has he been hiding behind?

At 1:47 PM, Blogger BBJ said...

I approve of extending fig leaves. Is this another call for new underwear for troops? Anyway, I think everyone involved in this war should be clothed. If the IDF has to start shooting at naked Hezbollah fighters, world opinion will get really cranky. (Although, if they were naked, and Lebanese civilians with no terrorist tendencies were clothed, this might get a lot easier. Think about it.)

Oh good grief. Where did these guys go to high school?

At 10:10 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Shifra... no need to apologize for "unstructured looney" posts. It's a blog. You are allowed to. And I find them amusing...

At 1:09 PM, Blogger StepIma said...

His mom is Gloria Vanderbilt... maybe he was taught that fig leaves extended under those designer jeans really are the key to world peace...

At 5:57 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

"android prototype" - my impression exactly.... Thanks for making us laugh in tough times...

At 12:41 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Maybe the handome semi-inteligent android was clandestinly slipping in a little Torah knoledge? www.torah.org/learning/kolhakollel/5764/bereishis.html

Or maybe he's not as semi-inteligent as his programmers and makeup people want him to appear!

Look for a fox on Fox, or better yet, watch israelnationalnews.com tv.

At 10:07 PM, Blogger have popcorn will lurk said...

What a howl!!

Maybe that was code for "I'm rooting for the Jews, but that's the most CNN will let me give away on the air".

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